A Google-a-Day Puzzle for Dec. 24











Our good friends at Google run a daily puzzle challenge and asked us to help get them out to the geeky masses. Each day’s puzzle will task your googling skills a little more, leading you to Google mastery. Each morning at 12:01 a.m. Eastern time you’ll see a new puzzle posted here.


SPOILER WARNING:
We leave the comments on so people can work together to find the answer. As such, if you want to figure it out all by yourself, DON’T READ THE COMMENTS!


Also, with the knowledge that because others may publish their answers before you do, if you want to be able to search for information without accidentally seeing the answer somewhere, you can use the Google-a-Day site’s search tool, which will automatically filter out published answers, to give you a spoiler-free experience.


And now, without further ado, we give you…


TODAY’S PUZZLE:



Note: Ad-blocking software may prevent display of the puzzle widget.




Ken is a husband and father from the San Francisco Bay Area, where he works as a civil engineer. He also wrote the NYT bestselling book "Geek Dad: Awesomely Geeky Projects for Dads and Kids to Share."

Read more by Ken Denmead

Follow @fitzwillie and @wiredgeekdad on Twitter.



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Bethenny Frankel and husband of 2 years separating






LOS ANGELES (AP) — Bethenny Frankel and husband Jason Hoppy are separating.


The 42-year-old TV personality, chef, author and entrepreneur told The Associated Press Sunday that the split brings her “great sadness.”






“This was an extremely difficult decision that as a woman and a mother, I have to accept as the best choice for our family,” Frankel said. “We have love and respect for one another and will continue to amicably co-parent our daughter who is and will always remain our first priority. This is an immensely painful and heartbreaking time for us.”


Frankel and Hoppy were married in 2010 and have a daughter, Bryn, who was born that same year. The couple’s courtship and marriage were documented in two reality series, “Bethenny Getting Married?” and “Bethenny Ever After…” Frankel gained fame as a star of “The Real Housewives of New York City.” Since her stint on the Bravo show, she has written four books, released a fitness video and founded her Skinnygirl line of cocktails, shapewear and nutritional supplements.


She launched a talk show, “Bethenny,” over the summer that is set to air nationally on Fox stations in 2013.


___


AP Entertainment Writer Sandy Cohen is on Twitter: www.twitter.com/APSandy .


Entertainment News Headlines – Yahoo! News





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Well: With Help Here and There, Preserving Independence in Old Age

My 92-year-old aunt, who is cognitively impaired and requires a walker or wheelchair to get around, still lives in her own apartment, where round-the-clock home health aides help her get to and from the bathroom, bathe, dress and undress, and go outside each day for some fresh air. The aides shop, prepare and serve meals, do light housekeeping and make sure she takes her medications on time.

But last month, my aunt’s long-term care insurance ran out, and her meager savings will soon do the same. Then what?

Her daughters, both of whom work to support their families, cannot afford the $150 a day for 24-hour care by a certified home health aide, and my aunt has nothing to sell that could bring in the needed cash. Nor does she yet qualify for Medicaid or have a terminal illness that would justify hospice care, which would be covered by Medicare.

Complicating matters, her daughters long ago promised that they would not put her in a nursing home.

Such dilemmas are increasingly common as people live longer. The number of Americans 65 and older is expected to double to 80 million in the next three decades. People 85 and older are the fastest-growing age group; by 2020, there will be 6.6 million people in that age bracket, when rates of debilitating ailments soar.

Most Americans over 65 will eventually need help with the so-called tasks of daily living — eating, dressing, bathing, shopping and the like. But with family members spread all over the map or unable to be full-time caregivers for other reasons, the need for new and better options will only increase.

When asked, 80 to 90 percent of older people say they want to remain in their own homes as long as possible. Yet remaining in one’s home indefinitely is not always the best choice, even if it is financially feasible. As life draws near a close, many older adults need more care than can be provided safely at home. Simply finding reputable home health aides can be a nightmare, and family members often are forced to fill gaps in even the best caregiving plans.

The challenge is all the more difficult when no one has thought through the options before a serious illness or injury makes it impossible for elders to return home without full-time help.

Many elders living independently need outside help long before they require round-the-clock care. A range of assistance and housing alternatives has rapidly sprung up to meet this demand. Many focus on improving accessibility in the home and access to neighborhood conveniences.

An older person living in the suburbs who can no longer drive may become isolated, lonely and at risk of malnutrition if there is no person or community service to shop for her and take her places. Even stairs are a major obstacle.

Elinor Ginzler, director of the Cahnmann Center for Supportive Services at the Jewish Council for the Aging in Rockville, Md., writes that “the ability to age in place is greatly determined by the physical design and accessibility of a home, as well as community features like the availability of nearby services and amenities, affordable housing and transportation options.”

Organizations like Staying in Place, a nonprofit group of volunteers, helps people age 50 and older in Woodstock, N.Y., and surrounding communities “maintain active, independent, fulfilling lives in their own homes.” For $125 a year (plus $50 for each additional household member over 50), the organization assists with paperwork and technology; free or low-cost transportation; referrals to discounted service workers; information about, and transport to, local classes and cultural and social activities; and recommendations for home health care agencies and personnel.

Other services that are free or low-cost include Meals on Wheels; friendly visiting; shopping services accessed by phone or computer; activities at senior centers; and adult day care centers.

There are also more costly commercial organizations like Home Instead Senior Care, an international network of more than 900 independently owned franchises that provide in-home nonmedical care for elders and support for their caregivers.

The organization sponsored a yearlong online study of 1,631 caregivers, 697 of whom were assisted by paid in-home nonmedical care. The study found that people receiving the additional paid care required 25 percent fewer doctor visits and were more likely to participate in adult day care.

Sadly, many aides are seriously underpaid. Home Instead, for instance, has lobbied to keep home health care aides exempt from minimum wage standards.

Henry Cisneros, former secretary of the United States Department of Housing and Urban Development and editor of the book “Independent for Life: Homes and Neighborhoods for an Aging America,” points out that “Americans are aging in traditional homes, neighborhoods and communities that were designed for yesterday’s demographic realities, not those of today or the future.”

Mr. Cisneros advocates changing our communities so that the elderly can remain in them. “Homes can be retrofitted, new age-appropriate homes built, existing neighborhoods reconnected, and new communities planned,” he wrote. For example, to accommodate declining eyesight, homes can be fitted with brighter bulbs, better lighting locations, easily accessed controls and nighttime guide lights.

Mr. Cisneros sees a pressing need for affordable packages of home modifications and maintenance to make residences more suitable for older people.

“A certified renovation package for aging in place could include roll-under kitchen and bathroom sinks, grab bars, curbless showers, lever faucets and door handles, a zero-step entrance, and wider doors and hallways,” he wrote.

While such changes have a price tag, they may cost a lot less than current care alternatives for the elderly.

Needed changes at the community level include affordable small-scale housing and cluster housing situated in walkable communities with nearby amenities, businesses, health facilities and public transportation.

Borrowing from the design of assisted living facilities, individual dwelling units might be located around a common space that includes dining areas and social rooms.

For elders who want to be near family members yet maintain their independence, so-called accessory dwelling units with their own kitchens and bathrooms are being built near or attached to family homes.


How to Know When Home Alone Is No Longer a Good Idea

Paula Spencer Scott, senior editor at Caring.com, recently compiled a guide to help families determine when the time has come to move older relatives from their homes and into a more supportive environment or, alternatively, to bring in a home health aide who can provide assistance. These signs to look for and questions to ask are adapted from Ms. Scott’s recommendations.

¶ Recent accidents or close calls, like a fall, medical scare or minor car accident.

¶ A slow recovery. How well was a recent illness weathered? Did it develop into something serious? Was medical help sought when needed?

¶ Worsening of a chronic health condition. As problems like chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, dementia or congestive heart failure progress, more help will be needed.

¶ Greater difficulty managing the so-called activities of daily living, like dressing, bathing and cooking.

¶ Bodily changes, like obvious weight loss or gain, increased frailty or unpleasant body odor.

¶ A loss of active friendships, including outings with friends, visits with neighbors or participation in religious or other group activities.

¶ Days spent without leaving the house, perhaps because of difficulty driving or a fear of using public transportation.

¶ Is someone checking in regularly? If not, is there a home-safety alarm system, a personal alarm system or a daily calling service in place?

¶ Is someone nearby to assist if there’s a fire, earthquake, flood or other disaster, and does the older resident understand plans for a catastrophe?

¶ Mail in a chaotic state, scattered about and unopened. Are there unpaid overdue bills, surprising thank-you notes from charities, piles of unread magazines?

¶ If an older relative is still driving, go along for a ride and look for failure to fasten the seat belt or heed dashboard warning lights; signs of tension, preoccupation or distraction while driving; damage to the vehicle that may indicate carelessness.

¶ In the kitchen, signs of excess or forgetfulness, like perishables well past their expiration dates.

¶ Favorite appliances are broken but not scheduled for repair.

¶ Signs of fires. Look for charred stove knobs or pot bottoms, potholders with burned edges, a discharged fire extinguisher. Do smoke and carbon monoxide detectors have live batteries?

¶ A once-neat home now cluttered, spills that were not cleaned up, grime coating bathroom and kitchen appliances or an overflowing laundry basket.

¶ Neglected plants or pets.

¶ Signs of neglect outside the home, like broken windows, debris-filled gutters and drains, uncollected rubbish and an overstuffed mailbox.

¶ Ask friends and neighbors whether your family member’s behavior has changed lately.

¶ Ask the person’s doctor whether you should be concerned about the person’s health or safety and whether a home assessment by a social worker or geriatric care manager may be advisable. If you expect resistance from the person, ask the doctor to “prescribe” a professional evaluation.

¶ If you are the primary caregiver, how are you doing? Are you increasingly exhausted, depressed or becoming resentful of the sacrifices you have to make to care for the person?

¶ Consider your older relative’s emotional state. If she is riddled with anxieties or increasingly lonely, then it may be time to make a move for reasons other than health and safety.

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E-Book Price War Has Yet to Arrive


Thor Swift for The New York Times


A Google e-reader is displayed at a bookstore. Sales of e-books for the devices have slowed this year.







Right about now, just as millions of e-readers and tablets are being slipped under Christmas trees, there was supposed to be a ferocious price war over e-books.




Last spring, the Justice Department sued five major publishers and Apple on e-book price-fixing charges. The case was a major victory for Amazon, and afterward there were widespread expectations — fueled by Amazon — that the price of e-books would plunge.


The most extreme outcome went like this: Digital versions of big books selling for $9.99 or less would give Amazon complete domination over the e-book market. As sales zoomed upward, even greater numbers of consumers would abandon physical books. The major publishers and traditional bookstores were contemplating a future that would pass them by.


But doomsday has not arrived, at least not yet. As four of the publishers have entered into settlements with regulators and revised the way they sell e-books, prices have selectively fallen but not as broadly or drastically as anticipated.


The $10 floor that publishers fought so hard to maintain for popular new novels is largely intact. Amazon, for instance, is selling Michael Connelly’s new mystery, “The Black Box,” for $12.74. New best sellers by David Baldacci and James Patterson cost just over $11.


One big reason for the lack of fireworks is that the triumph of e-books over their physical brethren is not happening quite as fast as forecast.


“The e-book market isn’t growing at the caffeinated level it was,” said Michael Norris, a Simba Information analyst who follows the publishing industry. “Even retailers like Amazon have to be wondering, how far can we go — or should we go — to make our prices lower than the other guys if it’s not helping us with market share?”


Adult e-book sales through August were up 34 percent from 2011, an impressive rate of growth if you forget that sales have doubled every year for the last four years. And there have been more recent signs of a market pausing for breath.


Macmillan, the only publisher that has not settled with the Justice Department, said last week as part of a statement from John Sargent, its chief executive, that “our e-book business has been softer of late, particularly for the last few weeks, even as the number of reading devices continues to grow.” His laconic conclusion: “Interesting.”


Mr. Norris said Simba, which regularly surveys e-book buyers, has been noticing what it calls “commitment to content” issues.


“A lot of these e-book consumers aren’t behaving like lab rats at a feeder bar,” the analyst said. “We have found that at any given time about a third of e-book users haven’t bought a single title in the last 12 months. I have a feeling it is the digital equivalent of the ‘overloaded night stand’ effect; someone isn’t going to buy any more books until they make a dent in reading the ones they have already acquired.”


Another, more counterintuitive possibility is that the 2011 demise of Borders, the second-biggest chain, dealt a surprising blow to the e-book industry. Readers could no longer see what they wanted to go home and order. “The print industry has been aiding and assisting the e-book industry since the beginning,” Mr. Norris said.


It is possible that Amazon, which controls about 60 percent of the e-book market, is merely holding back with price cuts for the right moment.


The next few weeks are when e-book sales traditionally take a big jump, as all those newly received devices are loaded up with content.


Amazon declined to comment beyond saying, “We have lowered prices for customers from the prices publishers set on a broad assortment of Kindle books.” Barnes & Noble declined to comment on its pricing strategy.


The question of the proper price for e-books has shadowed the industry ever since Amazon introduced the Kindle in late 2007 and created the first truly popular portable reading device. Amazon had a natural impulse to build a market and was an aggressive retailer in any case, so it took best sellers that cost $25 in independent bookstores and sold them for $9.99 as e-books. Consumers liked that. E-book adoption soared.


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Richard Adams dies at 65; gay marriage pioneer









Thirty-seven years ago, Richard Adams made history when he and his partner of four years, Anthony Sullivan, became one of the first gay couples in the country to be granted a marriage license. It happened in Boulder, Colo., where a liberal county clerk issued licenses to six same-sex couples in the spring of 1975.


Adams had hoped to use his marriage to secure permanent residency in the United States for Sullivan, an Australian who had been in the country on a limited visa and was facing deportation.


But Colorado's attorney general declared the Boulder marriages invalid. Several months later, Adams and Sullivan received a letter from the Immigration and Naturalization Service that denied Sullivan's petition for resident status in terms that left no doubt about the reason:





"You have failed to establish that a bona fide marital relationship can exist between two faggots," the notification read.


Adams, who later filed the first federal lawsuit demanding recognition of same-sex marriages, died Monday at his home in Hollywood after a brief illness, said his attorney, Lavi Soloway. He was 65.


Soloway described Adams and Sullivan as "pioneers who stood up and fought for something nobody at that time conceived of as a right, the right of gay couples to be married.


"Attitudes at the time were not supportive, to put it mildly," Soloway said. "They went on the Donahue show and people in the audience said some pretty nasty things. But they withstood it all because they felt it was important to speak out."


Born in Manila on March 9, 1947, Adams immigrated to the U.S. with his family when he was 12. He grew up in Long Prairie, Minn., studied liberal arts at the University of Minnesota and became a naturalized U.S. citizen in 1968.


By 1971 he was working in Los Angeles, where he met Sullivan and fell in love.


Four years later, the two men heard about Boulder County Clerk Clela Rorex: She had decided to issue marriage licenses to gay couples after the Boulder district attorney's office advised her that nothing in state law explicitly prohibited it.


On April 21, 1975, they obtained their license and exchanged marriage vows at the First Unitarian Church of Denver.


The Boulder marriages attracted national media attention, including an article in the New York Times that called Colorado "a mini-Nevada for homosexual couples." Rorex received obscene phone calls, as well as a visit from a cowboy who protested by demanding to marry his horse. (Rorex said she turned him down because the 8-year-old mare was underage.)


After their marriage, Adams and Sullivan filed a petition with the INS seeking permanent residency for Sullivan as the spouse of a U.S. citizen. In November 1975, they received the immigration agency's derogatory letter and lodged a formal protest. Officials reissued the denial notice without the word "faggots."


They took the agency to court in 1979, challenging the constitutionality of the denial. A federal district judge in Los Angeles upheld the INS decision, and Adams and Sullivan lost subsequent appeals.


In a second lawsuit, the couple argued that Sullivan's deportation after an eight-year relationship with Adams would constitute an "extreme hardship." In 1985 a three-judge panel of the U.S. 9th Circuit Court of Appeals rejected the hardship argument and opened the way for Sullivan to be sent back to Australia.


Because Australia had already turned down Adams' request for residency in that country, the couple decided the only way they could stay together was to leave the U.S. In 1985, they flew to Britain and drifted through Europe for the next year.


"It was the most difficult period because I had to leave my family as well as give up my job of 18 1/2 years. It was almost like death," Adams said in "Limited Partnership," a documentary scheduled for release next year.


The pair ended their self-imposed exile after a year and came home. They lived quietly in Los Angeles to avoid drawing the attention of immigration officials, but in recent years began to appear at rallies supporting same-sex marriage, Soloway said.


They were encouraged by new guidelines issued by the Obama administration this fall instructing immigration officials to stop deporting foreigners in long-standing same-sex relationships with U.S. citizens.


Although the policy change came more than three decades after Adams and Sullivan raised the issue, it gave Adams "a sense of vindication," Soloway said.


The day before he died, Sullivan told him that the most important victory was that they were able to remain a couple.


"Richard looked at me," Sullivan told Soloway, "and said, 'Yeah, you're right. We've won.'"


Adams, who was an administrator for a law firm until his retirement in 2010, is survived by Sullivan; his mother, Elenita; sisters Stella, Kathy, Julie and Tammie; and a brother, Tony.


elaine.woo@latimes.com





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A Google-a-Day Puzzle for Dec. 23











Our good friends at Google run a daily puzzle challenge and asked us to help get them out to the geeky masses. Each day’s puzzle will task your googling skills a little more, leading you to Google mastery. Each morning at 12:01 a.m. Eastern time you’ll see a new puzzle posted here.


SPOILER WARNING:
We leave the comments on so people can work together to find the answer. As such, if you want to figure it out all by yourself, DON’T READ THE COMMENTS!


Also, with the knowledge that because others may publish their answers before you do, if you want to be able to search for information without accidentally seeing the answer somewhere, you can use the Google-a-Day site’s search tool, which will automatically filter out published answers, to give you a spoiler-free experience.


And now, without further ado, we give you…


TODAY’S PUZZLE:



Note: Ad-blocking software may prevent display of the puzzle widget.




Ken is a husband and father from the San Francisco Bay Area, where he works as a civil engineer. He also wrote the NYT bestselling book "Geek Dad: Awesomely Geeky Projects for Dads and Kids to Share."

Read more by Ken Denmead

Follow @fitzwillie and @wiredgeekdad on Twitter.



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UK’s Kate and William to spend Christmas Day with her parents






LONDON (Reuters) – Britain’s Prince William and his pregnant wife Kate will spend Christmas Day with her parents, their office said on Saturday, in a break with the tradition of royals joining Queen Elizabeth at her country estate at Sandringham.


The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge will celebrate in private with Carole and Michael Middleton at their home in the village of Bucklebury, about 50 miles west of London.






“The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge will spend Christmas Day privately with the Middleton family,” a St James’s Palace spokesman said.


The couple’s decision was taken with the approval of the Queen. They are expected to visit Sandringham, in eastern England, for part of the Christmas holiday.


Kate, 30, who married the second-in-line to the throne in April 2011, spent four days in hospital this month with an acute form of morning sickness.


Members of the British royal family usually spend Christmas at Sandringham and stay until February, following a custom set by Queen Elizabeth’s father and grandfather. Kate and William spent Christmas there last year, meeting scores of wellwishers.


The Middletons are likely to join millions of Britons in watching Queen Elizabeth’s annual Christmas broadcast, a tradition that her grandfather George V started in 1932.


For the first time, the monarch has recorded her television broadcast in 3D. It will be shown at 1500 GMT on December 25.


(Reporting by Peter Griffiths; Editing by Kevin Liffey)


Celebrity News Headlines – Yahoo! News





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Genetic Gamble : Drugs Aim to Make Several Types of Cancer Self-Destruct


C.J. Gunther for The New York Times


Dr. Donald Bergstrom is a cancer specialist at Sanofi, one of three companies working on a drug to restore a tendency of damaged cells to self-destruct.







For the first time ever, three pharmaceutical companies are poised to test whether new drugs can work against a wide range of cancers independently of where they originated — breast, prostate, liver, lung. The drugs go after an aberration involving a cancer gene fundamental to tumor growth. Many scientists see this as the beginning of a new genetic age in cancer research.




Great uncertainties remain, but such drugs could mean new treatments for rare, neglected cancers, as well as common ones. Merck, Roche and Sanofi are racing to develop their own versions of a drug they hope will restore a mechanism that normally makes badly damaged cells self-destruct and could potentially be used against half of all cancers.


No pharmaceutical company has ever conducted a major clinical trial of a drug in patients who have many different kinds of cancer, researchers and federal regulators say. “This is a taste of the future in cancer drug development,” said Dr. Otis Webb Brawley, the chief medical and scientific officer of the American Cancer Society. “I expect the organ from which the cancer came from will be less important in the future and the molecular target more important,” he added.


And this has major implications for cancer philanthropy, experts say. Advocacy groups should shift from fund-raising for particular cancers to pushing for research aimed at many kinds of cancer at once, Dr. Brawley said. John Walter, the chief executive officer of the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society, concurred, saying that by pooling forces “our strength can be leveraged.”


At the heart of this search for new cancer drugs are patients like Joe Bellino, who was a post office clerk until his cancer made him too sick to work. Seven years ago, he went into the hospital for hernia surgery, only to learn he had liposarcoma, a rare cancer of fat cells. A large tumor was wrapped around a cord that connects the testicle to the abdomen. “I was shocked,” he said in an interview this summer.


Companies have long ignored liposarcoma, seeing no market for drugs to treat a cancer that strikes so few. But it is ideal for testing Sanofi’s drug because the tumors nearly always have the exact genetic problem the drug was meant to attack — a fusion of two large proteins. If the drug works, it should bring these raging cancers to a halt. Then Sanofi would test the drug on a broad range of cancers with a similar genetic alteration. But if the drug fails against liposarcoma, Sanofi will reluctantly admit defeat.


“For us, this is a go/no-go situation,” said Laurent Debussche, a Sanofi scientist who leads the company’s research on the drug.


The genetic alteration the drug targets has tantalized researchers for decades. Normal healthy cells have a mechanism that tells them to die if their DNA is too badly damaged to repair. Cancer cells have grotesquely damaged DNA, so ordinarily they would self-destruct. A protein known as p53 that Dr. Gary Gilliland of Merck calls the cell’s angel of death normally sets things in motion. But cancer cells disable p53, either directly, with a mutation, or indirectly, by attaching the p53 protein to another cellular protein that blocks it. The dream of cancer researchers has long been to reanimate p53 in cancer cells so they will die on their own.


The p53 story began in earnest about 20 years ago. Excitement ran so high that, in 1993, Science magazine anointed it Molecule of the Year and put it on the cover. An editorial held out the possibility of “a cure of a terrible killer in the not too distant future.”


Companies began chasing a drug to restore p53 in cells where it was disabled by mutations. But while scientists know how to block genes, they have not figured out how to add or restore them. Researchers tried gene therapy, adding good copies of the p53 gene to cancer cells. That did not work.


Then, instead of going after mutated p53 genes, they went after half of cancers that used the alternative route to disable p53, blocking it by attaching it to a protein known as MDM2. When the two proteins stick together, the p53 protein no longer functions. Maybe, researchers thought, they could find a molecule to wedge itself between the two proteins and pry them apart.


The problem was that both proteins are huge and cling tightly to each other. Drug molecules are typically tiny. How could they find one that could separate these two bruisers, like a referee at a boxing match?


In 1996, researchers at Roche noticed a small pocket between the behemoths where a tiny molecule might slip in and pry them apart. It took six years, but Roche found such a molecule and named it Nutlin because the lab was in Nutley, N.J.


But Nutlins did not work as drugs because they were not absorbed into the body.


Roche, Merck and Sanofi persevered, testing thousands of molecules.


At Sanofi, the stubborn scientist leading the way, Dr. Debussche, maintained an obsession with p53 for two decades. Finally, in 2009, his team, together with Shaomeng Wang at the University of Michigan and a biotech company, Ascenta Therapeutics, found a promising compound.


The company tested the drug by pumping it each day into the stomachs of mice with sarcoma.


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Preoccupations: When Relocation Is a Way of Life





ON New Year’s Day, the company I work for, Four Seasons Hotels and Resorts, will move me from Washington to Paris, where I will become a regional vice president of the company and general manager of the Hotel George V, which it manages.







Daniel Rosenbaum for The New York Times

Gathering the frequent-mover miles: From left are Christian and Meg Clerc, and their daughters, Eleanor and Georgia, at home in Washington.







My wife, Meg, teaches at a Montessori school. She and our teenage daughters, Eleanor and Georgia, will reunite with me at the end of the school year. It’s the seventh move for Meg and me: about every three years for the last two decades, we’ve packed and unpacked, and left newfound schools, friends, cars, dry cleaners, banks and homes, and found newer ones.


If you want to advance in the hotel industry, you’d better be able to check “yes” next to the box that asks, “Willing to relocate?” Mobility must be in your DNA if you want to move up. Originally from Switzerland, I myself have moved eight times over 25 years of working in hotels, rising from hotel restaurant food runner to hotel general manager: from Gstaad to Lausanne, Switzerland; then to Washington, Rome, Paris and back to Washington, then to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico, and to Chicago and Washington once more. Eleanor, now 17, was born in Rome. Georgia, 14, joined the journey on our first assignment in Washington.


Meg knew the score — and welcomed the global lifestyle — when she married me. In fact, she chose a mobile career herself, knowing that there would be Montessori schools worldwide.


The company provides good logistical support when it moves its employees. And on the home front, we have grown increasingly adaptive, and the moves have become easier over the years. The process begins when I first realize that a move may be in the works. Meg and I go out for lunch or coffee and review our trusty to-do list to become move-ready. Then we take our daughters out to lunch or dinner and broach the subject, beginning with “How would you feel if we moved to X?”


The worst reaction was when we planned to move back to Washington from Chicago less than a year after arriving there from Mexico. We thought the girls would be thrilled to reunite with friends in a familiar place. We thought wrong. In unison, they broke out in tears; they had just made new friends and were starting to fit in again.


Meg, so skilled at working with children as a teacher, had them talk about the roots of their fears and sadness, which usually revolve around establishing new social networks. I, racked by guilt about upsetting their cart again, blurted that they could get the puppy they had been begging for. (I had been adamantly opposed until then.) The tears stopped. Needless to say, our pup, Snickers, will be moving to Paris, too.


To stay sane at relocation time, we keep the house we’re in as homey as possible until we move, then turn the new house into a home as fast as we can. That way, we don’t have to stare at cardboard boxes on both ends of the trip. We can pack in two weeks.


Moving makes you prioritize what’s important. You have to decide what’s crucial enough to bring, and what’s marginal enough to leave behind. With friends, you have to choose those to see before you go, and the ones you want to stay in touch with after the move.


Each of us has certain things we take along — our “transitional objects.” For example, I need the big wooden credenza that’s been in my family for generations, a great coffee machine, my A.S. Roma soccer-club shirt and my watch box — after all, I am Swiss. For Meg, it’s not about things, but about creating a cozy, well-lit new space. The girls still bring their favorite stuffed animals along with photos, but their most important transitional object is each other.


BUILDING a new network of friends can be as daunting for Meg and me as it is for the girls. We’ve found friends among new work colleagues and through tight-knit expat communities. But there’s a danger of getting stuck in a cultural bubble and never befriending local people.


Our moves have brought us a great appreciation of cultural differences. The ability to adapt quickly to change helps in all kinds of situations. The moves have also prepared our daughters to make new friends quickly. Still, we wonder and worry how it will affect their future relationships. Will they have trouble forming long-lasting bonds?


We find inspiration, meanwhile, in
the lyrics of “You’re My Home,” the Billy Joel song: “I never had a place that I could call my very own, but that’s
all right, my love, ’cause you’re my home.”


As told to Perry Garfinkel.



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Appeals court puts hold on California gay conversion ban









A federal appeals court Friday put a hold on a new state law intended to prevent therapists from trying to change a minor's sexual orientation, dealing a setback to gay rights groups.


A three-judge panel of the U.S. 9th Circuit Court of Appeals agreed to block the law, scheduled to take effect Jan. 1, pending a decision on its constitutionality.


"This is a very good sign for our clients," said Mathew Staver, found of Liberty Counsel, a religious liberties group that sued to block the law, arguing that it violates free speech rights. "To get an injunction pending appeal is a very difficult thing to do."








A spokeswoman for state Atty. Gen. Kamala D. Harris said Harris would "vigorously defend" a law that banned what she termed an "unsound and harmful practice."


The law would subject psychologists, psychiatrists and other mental health professionals to discipline by their licensing boards for providing minors therapy to change their sexual orientation. The state and many professional groups say the therapy is ineffective and potentially dangerous.


A District Court judge initially rejected the suit by Liberty Counsel, whose clients include a 15-year-old boy undergoing the therapy. The Christian-oriented legal group appealed that decision to the 9th Circuit.


The judges who are hearing the case are Alfred T. Goodwin, appointed by President Nixon; Edward Leavy, a Reagan appointee; and Milan D. Smith Jr., named to the court by President George W. Bush.


Staver, calling the preliminary injunction "very welcome news," said it was "never routine" and granted only in extraordinary situations when the court believes an appeal has a "likelihood of success."


UC Irvine Law School Dean Erwin Chemerinsky, who believes that the law is constitutional, said its opponents "won this round."


"This doesn't determine the ultimate outcome by the 9th Circuit," the constitutional law expert said. "It still has to rule on the merits, and it could well go to the Supreme Court. But obviously this is a preliminary loss for supporters of the law."


California's ban on trying to change a minor's sexual orientation, the first of its kind in the nation, has divided the lower courts. The federal judge in Sacramento who refused to block the law was appointed by President Obama. She concluded that it did not violate the 1st Amendment. Her colleague on the same bench, appointed by President George H.W. Bush, concluded that it was likely that the law infringed on free speech protections.


Communication between professionals and their clients generally has less 1st Amendment protection than other forms of speech. For instance, a lawyer or doctor who negligently gives bad advice may be found liable for malpractice, and licensing requirements for professionals may be restrictive.


The Supreme Court upheld a law that required doctors to tell patients about potential harmful effects of an abortion, but the 9th Circuit blocked a federal law designed to prevent doctors from discussing the benefits of marijuana with patients.


Therapy to change sexual orientation may involve psychoanalysis, cognitive behavioral treatment and religious and spiritual counseling. Some therapists have practiced aversion therapy using hormone treatments and nausea-inducing drugs to combat sexual impulses.


A task force report by the American Psychological Assn. in 2009 said the therapy could trigger depression, suicide and substance abuse, but also noted that there was scant research on the issue.


The new law was supported by the California Psychological Assn., the California chapter of the National Assn. of Social Workers and the California Division of the American Assn. for Marriage and Family Therapy.


Gay rights activists Friday minimized the setback and noted that the court has agreed to review the law on a fast track.


"Every leading medical and mental health organization has warned therapists and parents that these practices do not work and put young people at risk of serious harm, including depression and suicide," said Shannon Minter, legal director of the National Center for Lesbian Rights. "No young person should be subjected to these dangerous practices, and no licensed therapist should be permitted to engage in practices that cause such serious harm."


maura.dolan@latimes.com





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